Things I never wanted to do and yet had to….

I have a bucket list of things I want to do in this life.  There’s also an unofficial list of things I never want to do.  On the “Never Want To Do” list was; plastic surgery, tattoo’s, implants, visit a sex shop and vegetarianism.  There are other things on the list but I’m too afraid to name them for fear I will end up having to do them too.  Now I know the words sex shop peaked your interest but that’s not what I’m going to write about.  Tattoo’s and vegetarianism are on my mind today.  Did I hear a hushed sigh?

Three weeks ago I started a new diet that I hope will just become a new way of life.  A more Alkaline diet consisting of no red meat, more green vegetables, and 2 cups of fruit a day, whole grains, and no gluten and no/little dairy is what’s on the menu.  I have a new love for Kombucha and am now more annoying than ever to my family.  Oh, I forgot the big one… no or little alcohol.  Since I’m in sales, this will prove difficult.  Drinking wine and dining are a big part of my job. Oh, whom am I kidding?   The first real crappy day I have will be the biggest test of them all.  There is nothing like wine to soothe the rough edges of a tough day.  I digress.

I’ve got a nutritionist working with me through the details.  When faced with food decisions I don’t always make the best ones.  Who knew lentils are protein but mostly carbohydrates?  Lemons are acidic until they reach your stomach and then they are more alkaline.  I have a little notebook that is slowly filling up with wisdom.  I’m not a vegetarian yet but I am slipping in that direction.  Fish, eggs, tofu, beans and organic chicken are the proteins of choice.  Please note, only one protein source separates me from vegetarianism.     I hold my ground though as it is health concerns that motivate me.   The more I read, the more I know these steps are the right ones.  More importantly, my energy level is stronger than ever.  So, I might attend your pig roast but don’t be annoyed if I bring my own salad!

As for the tattoo, that was a finishing touch of a long rebuilding process.  Sitting in a chair much like that found in a dentist’s office the morning of my scheduled tattoo I did think, “Why Mae must you do this?  More pain and for beauty?”  Sometimes I talk to myself like I’m some madcap teen needing reprimanding.  I never questioned getting the tattoo, as I just wanted to finish the construction of my breast.  I talked to my tattooed friends about the process and all they mentioned was the pain involved.  That’s why I clasped the arms of my chair, clenched my teeth and questioned my own sanity.  I know pain and this is my posture to endure it.

Sloan Kettering is not just any tattoo parlor.  A young doctor was my artist and most of the time was spent matching colors and deciding where to put the tattoo.  It was actually kind of fun.  Then when we got down to the business of actually tattooing she put a numbing cream on me.  Most of my discomfort was in my head.  I kept waiting for the pain.  I might add that a week before my breast surgery my dentist had to fill 3 cavities without giving me any Novocain.  Yep, all I could do was say Hail Mary’s over and over in my head.  I thought of that as I got the tattoo but in hindsight, it was nothing like that horrible visit to the dentist.  In fact, any woman who has gotten to the point of getting the tattoo needn’t worry.  She’s been through far worse.  Having two wires inserted into your breast then smashing it between two metal plates wins the pain prize.  Having an expander inserted under your pectoral muscle and then pumping it up comes in a close second.  The tattoo didn’t even make my top 5 horror moments.  It’s all worth it though.  The finishing touch to a work of art is how I look at it.

So, what’s on my bucket list?  It has gotten smaller and simpler over the years.  Seeing Yellowstone Park is still on it, so is getting a dog but mostly I just want to enjoy everyday for what it is.  Sunny or cloudy it’s a gift to use wisely.




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4 Responses to Things I never wanted to do and yet had to….

  1. Big Girl says:

    Laughing so hard I wet my pants remains on my bucket list…I’ve done it enough to take off but the laugh is worth it.

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